CHILD ADVOCATES of Northeast Oklahoma

CANO in the Spotlight

Recently, Child Advocates of Northeast Oklahoma (CANO) has been highlighted through interviews with Ranger Roofing and the KGLC radio station in Miami, OK.

Ranger Roofing of Oklahoma is a local roofing contractor that gives back to the community by raising awareness about various social issues in the Tulsa area and throughout the state by promoting non-profit and non-governmental organizations that work to help alleviate some of the issues.  This month Ranger Roofing is promoting the work of Child Advocates of Northeast Oklahoma on their website through an interview with our agency.  Use this LINK to access their website and read the full CANO interview.

In addition, Angela Henderson, CANO Executive Director, has been interviewed several times on the air with Mike Woodruff, the KGLC station manager.  Use the audio link below to hear a portion of one of the interviews with Angela sharing about CASA and our volunteers.

 

 

February Parenting Tip

During the month of February, CANO will be featuring tips on “Showing Love to Your Children” and “Teaching Children How to Show Love to Others”. 

Check our CANO Facebook site (https://www.facebook.com/CANO4Kids/) daily to find some great reminders on ways we can show love to our kids during the ever-increasing “busy-ness” of our lives.

Showing Love to Your Children

“Roses are red, violets are blue…catch me if you can, as I speed by you.” If this phrase should be printed in a greeting card to your family members, you may be due for a “love intervention.”

Feeling loved is essential to the emotional development and well-being of every child. However, in today’s over-programmed, hurry-up world, many parents (especially fathers) get caught up in the “busy-ness” of providing for their children’s basic needs – food, clothing, and shelter – and fail to adequately express love to their children.

For most working adults, the elusive balance between work life and home life is an ever-present source of stress. The demands of bosses, friends, and must-do’s cause some parents to focus on their demanding schedules, overlooking the emotional needs of their children. Research indicates that showing love to our children is the most important step a parent can take to raise healthy and emotionally-stable children.

Child Advocates of Northeast Oklahoma believes that the month of February (the “love” month) is a great time to remember to emphasize showing love to our children on a daily basis.  The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) provides some great reminders for parents in their website article, “Showing Love for Your Child Tips”. (Read the full article at https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/news-features-and-safety-tips/Pages/14-Ways-to-Show-Love-for-Your-Child-This-Valentine%27s-Day.aspx.)

The AAP emphasizes using positive and encouraging words with your child.  Stressed-out parents should avoid using sarcasm or mockery and eliminate any put-downs from their speech. Children often don’t understand a put-down, even when said in jest.  Where children are concerned, verbal messages that could create negative feelings are best avoided.

“To learn empathy for others, children need to receive empathy from a parent,” said Angela Henderson, Executive Director of CANO. “This is why parenting techniques, such as ‘Love and Logic’ work so well. In acknowledging the child’s feelings of hurt, anger, and frustration, the parent can drill down to the cause of the behavior and listen and support as the child brainstorms more constructive ways to handle the messes of life.”

Responding promptly and lovingly to a child’s physical and emotional needs sends the message to the child that he or she is very important to the parent.

“It’s so important to be available to your child, even when it’s not the best time for you,” Henderson said. “Take time to listen to your child and ask clarifying questions. This lets the child know that you are really listening to him and that you care about what is happening.”

Schedule “dates” with your children to develop a strong personal relationship with her. Make plans to regularly spend time alone with your child doing something she enjoys. Amazing conversations can evolve while chatting together as you go on walks, ride bicycles, play ball, or work a jigsaw puzzle.

As a parent, one of the most important gifts you can give your child is to help him develop self-esteem. Your child needs your steady support and help to discover their own individual strengths.  Your child needs you to believe in them as they learn to believe in themselves. Loving them, spending time with them, listening to them, and celebrating lessons learned from their mistakes and successes are all part of the process.

“Bottom line, children need to hear their parents say ‘I love you’ every single day, not just on Valentine’s Day. There are no words of affirmation that are more important for your child to hear – no matter their age,” Henderson said.

Dr. Gary Chapman, a renowned marriage counselor and author of “The 5 Love Languages of Children” underscores a child’s need to feel loved.  He stresses, “Every child is born with a love tank and I compare it to a gas tank in a car.  When the love tank is full, the world looks beautiful and we feel loved.  When the love tank is empty, we feel discouraged and uncertain about ourselves and our relationships.”

CANO Monthly Newsletters 

To enjoy reading the news in the Child Advocates of Northeast Oklahoma (CANO) monthly newsletter, simply click on a date below.

January 2018          

December 2017          November 2017          October 2017

September 2017         August 2017                 July 2017

June 2017                     May 2017                     April 2017

March 2017                 February 2017             January 2017

CASA Volunteers Serving Quapaw Tribe

Quapaw Chairman John Berrey and Melinda Stotts, Vice President of the CANO Board of Directors

In September 2017, Child Advocates of Northeast Oklahoma (CANO) made a formal agreement with the Quapaw Tribe to provide Court Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) for abused and neglected children under their tribal jurisdiction.  CANO staff and volunteers are excited about expanding their services to the Quapaw children.

A tribal judge will assign CASA volunteers to cases of child abuse and neglect within the tribal court system.  Once assigned to a case, the CASA volunteers have the power to observe the child’s situation, report to the court, make recommendations and ask for changes that are in the best interest of the child.  That child will have a “new voice” in the courtroom and a better chance for finding a safe, loving forever home.

Jon D. Douthitt, District Court Judge for the Quapaw Tribal Court, was instrumental in getting this agreement formalized. Judge Douthitt is delighted to see it come to fruition.  He stated, “Children can be lost in the shuffle during legal proceedings that will profoundly affect them.  CASA works to make sure that these children’s interests are protected and that the impact of the court proceedings on them is reduced to the extent possible.”

In the 1800’s, the Quapaw Tribe, like so many other tribes, was relocated to a reservation in Oklahoma Territory. Most of the Quapaw people still live in the state today. The Tribe’s headquarters, which is located in Quapaw, OK, lies within the 13th Judicial District which CANO currently is serving.  This expansion into the Quapaw Tribal Court is a “win-win” for all involved

“This is an important step in assuring all Tribal members’ children and other citizens’ children are safe and well cared for in our communities. This goes to the heart of our values, as family-oriented people.  So, we are honored to be part of the CASA system,” said Quapaw Chairman John Berrey.

CANO Board President Susan Young added, “The board members of CANO are very happy to have the opportunity to provide CASA services to the Quapaw tribe. We look forward to working with Judge Douthitt, Chairman Berrey, and the Quapaw Tribal Courts to assure the safety and security of all the tribe’s children.”